Mayer's apology

[Robert]

Exiting the media game?

dZUkhbAiveQ

[Spudman]

Wow! He got pretty choked up.

I dig John and I don't really care what he said. He's right though. It's like someone is always gunning for you when you get to the level he is at and I wish that stupid sort of persecution would just quit. Who really cares what he said? In 50 years nobody is going to remember and in 200 it will just be a joke. It's so petty what people latch on to in order to make themselves feel better. I see plenty of it from people who aren't successful always trying to find fault in those that are. It's like they want those successful people to fail so that they can feel better about themselves. I'm just tired of it all.

John - I don't care what you say. Just keep playing your guitar and if you want to be crusty that's alright with me because I hear the truth from your instrument and your music.

[MAXIFUNK]

HERE IS WHAT HE SAID!

Playboy: Do black women throw themselves at you?

John Mayer : I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a f—kin’ David Duke c–k. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

He tried to be slick and when he realized he F'ED up he then tried to clean it up.

John Mayer:
Someone asked me the other day, 'What does it feel like now to have a 'hood pass?' " he told Playboy. "

And by the way, it's sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a 'hood pass, you could call it a n---a pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a 'hood pass if you really have a 'hood pass? But I said, 'I can't really have a 'hood pass.' I've never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, 'We're full.' "


Once again tryng to be slick AKA HIP!
He's not new to the media he knows how the the game gets played and what he can say and can not say and get away with it, stupid is as stupid does sometimes.

He can play his Behind off but his mouth needs to think as quick as his fingers not as quick as his lack of common sense.

When will folks learn to just shut up and play. ROTFLMAO @ his stupidity.

[Lev]

I do hope he means what he said in his apology. As a musician I hold him in very high regard, some of his music from the JM3 and Continumn records re-ignited my love for the electric guitar and as a result has had a massive influence on my own playing style.

But I remember posting here a year or two ago that he needs to just shut up and play music. Nothing teaches you in life like your own mistakes so hopefully he means what he said and will from now on just make great music.

[Tig]

I'd guess he didn't mean any harm, and was just talking "clever" (crap) in the interview, which obviously was a mistake. He has apologized sincerely for it, which should be enough. His recent interview in Guitar World exposed how deep he can be, which says much more than a screw up in Playboy.

Edit: After reading so many comments about what Mayer has said in the past caught me a little off guard. I didn't know about his history of being a jerk! I guess I don't keep up with that kind of stuff. It sounds like he needs to grow up.
:saw:
I'd give him the simple advice from the Frank Zappa album title, "Shut Up and Play Yer Guitar". :R

[Bloozcat]

Aside from his talent as a musician, I find him to be a pretty classless individual.

The things he said about Jessica Simpson are typical of this. Cruel, insensitive and just plain hurtful comments about someone he briefly dated say a lot more about John than they do about the woman...and it's not just Jessica Simpson he's made disparaging remarks about. I don't know why any decent woman would date him given his lack of self control. He acts like a 14-year old on the playground...only his playground is the world stage.

I'll bet his mother is really proud every time she reads another of his interviews.

[sunvalleylaw]

The media game that exists today drives me nuts frankly. All this focus on what John said or didn't say when pressured constantly, when there could actually a thoughtful discussion in the media of the issues that face our nation and the world. Rather than discuss the gazillions of ordinary criminal or personal injury cases, we have a distorted, hyper focus on cases like OJ and the McDonald's coffee case.

That said, when one is a public figure, one has to learn to engage one's brain before opening your mouth. John is a guitarist and musician. In my mind, a great one. He is not a statesman. He is only 30 or so, and has had tremendous focus on him during a period of life where my own life would not have stood up to that level of scrutiny. In today's digital world, where "news" travels via Facebook and Twitter etc. in an instant, I doubt many of us would survive long term without saying something stupid. I am pretty sure I would at some point.

I don't think I can really tell anything from what I receive via media that really tells me about him, but he seems to have a good, sensitive heart, but gets in trouble when he tries to be cool. Trying to be cool never worked for me. He would be well served if he stopped running that mouth in these interviews, especially about any relationships he may have.

I hope he learns what he can from it, then lets it go and carries on. Less Twitter and more music.

[piebaldpython]

WOW!!! Assuming that Maxifunk's quotes above are correct.......it's just amazing to believe that he's that brain-dead to make the statements (the orig, not the apology) that he did.

Again, proving that like some actors/actresses, once they get out of their craft/medium, they are dumber than cow-chips.

Common-sense tells you how far you can go and I guess he doesn't have a "governor switch" on his mouth.

Just sing and play your damn guitar. Don't talk.

[Spudman]

Why the double standard? How come it's okay for Lenny Bruce, Redd Foxx, Richard Prior, Robin Williams, Howard Stern and so in to talk like this but it's not for John? I think people just need to lighten up all the way around. I actually thought he was funny. So what if he doesn't sleep with black women. That's his right and I feel it's his right to say it anyway he wants. I thought the description was pretty vivid. I got it. He has a very creative and artistic mind so he thinks in pictures and that's how he describes his world.

[Heywood Jablomie]

Regardless of what one thinks about the interview and what his comments were supposed to mean, the guy remains a putz.

[sumitomo]

Can't We All Just Get Along!!! :cry: now where's my Zoloft! Oh forget it I'm gunna kill myself. Sumi:D:D

[MAXIFUNK]

Why the double standard? How come it's okay for Lenny Bruce, Redd Foxx, Richard Prior, Robin Williams, Howard Stern and so in to talk like this but it's not for John? I think people just need to lighten up all the way around. I actually thought he was funny. So what if he doesn't sleep with black women. That's his right and I feel it's his right to say it anyway he wants. I thought the description was pretty vivid. I got it. He has a very creative and artistic mind so he thinks in pictures and that's how he describes his world.


Spud,

The world could care less if he dates Women of African Decent or if he uses the N word in a off the cuff way as a attempt to be colorful.

But what I do care about is someone who has been schooled by A&R departments of his record labels, his personal public relations folks and alike and still uses his interviews to use language that could get him in a fire storm of negative publicity in the gaze of all publicity is good publicity.

It's just plain stupid and shows such a lack of maturity and common sense it is pathetic. Also, he is 30 not 12 he's more than old enough to know how to conduct himself.

As for why do comedians get a pass it is because you have certain level knowledge going into their shows they are and will say somethings that would never be said in any other setting.

I have been around hundreds if not thousands of interviews over the years as a bodyguard to the stars of music, movies, and athletics and have heard the stupid comments in person and read the miss quotes form interviews as well.

I am not giving the media a pass for its useless way it spreads its rhetoric but I will not also give a pass to a star who knows better but yet stills spews stupid comments on a regular basis either.

I once heard this back stage at a toys for tots drive in LA around 1992 or 19993 Words to live by Stevie Wonder talking to Ice Cube

"know your audience and the forum you are in and speak respectfully, thoughtfully, cautiously, and honestly and be simple and clear and you'll do fine with the media."

That is what he said to Ice Cube after asking Stevie how he handles the media so well.

[Bloozcat]

Why the double standard? How come it's okay for Lenny Bruce, Redd Foxx, Richard Prior, Robin Williams, Howard Stern and so in to talk like this but it's not for John? I think people just need to lighten up all the way around. I actually thought he was funny. So what if he doesn't sleep with black women. That's his right and I feel it's his right to say it anyway he wants. I thought the description was pretty vivid. I got it. He has a very creative and artistic mind so he thinks in pictures and that's how he describes his world.


I don't see a double standard at all. Other than Howard Stern, the others are all comedians. Comedy is almost always funny at the expense of someone else. They specialize in making fun of everyone and everything, regardless of who's toes they may step on. And Lenny Bruce was the guy who exposed the ridiculousness of the labels people use everyday to demean others. Howard Stern is simply a calculating opportunist. He's cultivated a crass, uncouth, rabble rousing image that he exploits just for ratings. A great role model, is he. Even he must privately laugh that people actually listen to him.

Creative? A speech class with John would be a really exhilarating adventure in oratory excellence. Uh, John, can you express yourself without the denegrating vituperation please?

John's a guitar player. It's what he does best and he should stick to it. That's his creative expression. His attemps at being cute and clever fall flat...as his career may likely do if he continues this way. Listening to John in an interview is like watching a blind man wandering around in a mine field.

[Eric]

I don't want to make myself a target, because I'm just as imperfect as everyone else, but I have always liked celebrities who first focus on being good people.

I think it's desperately hard, and there are pressures I can't understand when you get to a certain level of celebrity, but that has to be the goal. Through everything I do, I try (and frequently fail) to put my behavior first, accomplishment second.

He definitely brought some of the pressure on himself by being a media darling, and I have really hated his cutesy crap from the minute he came out (his comments about how so many great guitarists have never made teenage girls cry made me want to vomit). His words do matter. I don't overlook that, but I know that we all have low points in life.

Hopefully he can make a real change in his life, not just the appearance of one for PR reasons.

[marnold]

Why the double standard? How come it's okay for Lenny Bruce, Redd Foxx, Richard Prior, Robin Williams, Howard Stern and so in to talk like this but it's not for John?
Probably because those guys are seen as comedians so what they say will be seen in that light. Those guys certainly took plenty of flak in their lives over what they've said, no matter how firmly their tongues were planted in their cheeks. Don Imus got knocked off the air for comments far more innocuous than Mayer's. It is more than a bit naive to assume that you can say anything without people getting ticked about it, much less things like that. Whether that's right or wrong is largely immaterial. It simply is.

[bcdon]

I think people just need to lighten up all the way around. I actually thought he was funny. So what if he doesn't sleep with black women. That's his right and I feel it's his right to say it anyway he wants. I thought the description was pretty vivid. I got it. He has a very creative and artistic mind so he thinks in pictures and that's how he describes his world.
I agree with you. Mayer has a right to say whatever he wants to say. You either believe in free speech or you don't. Just watch this hysterical Chris Rock video and ask yourself why people can laugh at it but not at an off the cuff remark by Mayer.

t7HHB3sDtfA&NR

[tunghaichuan]

I agree with you. Mayer has a right to say whatever he wants to say. You either believe in free speech or you don't. Just watch this hysterical Chris Rock video and ask yourself why people can laugh at it but not at an off the cuff remark by Mayer.


See, that's the downside of free speech, everyone has the same right. So if I don't like Mayer, I'm exercising my right to free speech to say so. And if someone calls me a douche bag, then that is their right.

You're right about one thing: either it is free speech or it isn't. And that means that anyone has a right to say anything they want, even the person whose opinion you don't like.

[bcdon]

even the person whose opinion you don't like.
Free speech is precisely for those opinions that you don't agree with; after all, that's where the rubber meets the road. It's very easy to support free speech for things you agree with but who wants to live in an echo chamber? Not me..well not without a screaming amph! :dude

[MAXIFUNK]

I think more folks than I can shake a stick at hide behind FREE SPEECH to spread garbage.

John's commits where not the worst nor was I offended. I have seen far worst. I understood what he was trying to say but he chose all the wrongs words to say it. There was just no need to answers the questions that way.

Someone like a David Duke (since John brought him up) can say what ever he wants but if he says it around me I'll put his right to free speech upside his ......................!!! D. D. and people of like mind can say & print what they desire just be ready for the reaction to your use of your right of free speech. It is not the 1950's no more people are no longer scared to bring him or others to task plain and simple.

With the right of free speech comes a big responsibility of proper use no matter if you think so or not and it applies to all of us no matter if your a day laborer, comedian, priest, or 3rd grade math teacher.

John Mayer F'ed up and his right to free speech to say what he wants has very little to do with the fact he said something pretty damn stupid.

I am done with it getting back to all things axe related.

[just strum]

Why the double standard? How come it's okay for Lenny Bruce, Redd Foxx, Richard Prior, Robin Williams, Howard Stern and so in to talk like this but it's not for John? I think people just need to lighten up all the way around. I actually thought he was funny. So what if he doesn't sleep with black women. That's his right and I feel it's his right to say it anyway he wants. I thought the description was pretty vivid. I got it. He has a very creative and artistic mind so he thinks in pictures and that's how he describes his world.


I agree - not losing any sleep over his comments. There are a hell of a lot of more important things in the world.

[tjcurtin1]

With the right of free speech comes a big responsibility of proper use no matter if you think so or not and it applies to all of us no matter if your a day laborer, comedian, priest, or 3rd grade math teacher.



There's the heart of the matter - free speech is a sacred privilege, one that many people struggling over centuries have given their lives for. It demeans the greatness of the privilege to demean it by applying it to careless or purposefully hateful or destructive purposes - even if such use may be deemed legal. Use it responsibly!

[just strum]

There's the heart of the matter - free speech is a sacred privilege, one that many people struggling over centuries have given their lives for. It demeans the greatness of the privilege to demean it by applying it to careless or purposefully hateful or destructive purposes - even if such use may be deemed legal. Use it responsibly!

If you can't use it the way you want - then it isn't free. Walking away from it, turning off the station or whatever is the choice of the person that doesn't want to hear it.

Like all of this - I don't want to hear it so I'm out of here.

[tjcurtin1]

If you can't use it the way you want - then it isn't free. Walking away from it, turning off the station or whatever is the choice of the person that doesn't want to hear it.

Like all of this - I don't want to hear it so I'm out of here.
Unfortunately, many people like the benefits of freedom without accepting the responsibility that comes with it. No one in a 'free' society has the right, in reality, to do just what they like when they like without regard for the consequences or the affects that it has on others - you can't yell 'Fire!' in a crowded theater because you feel you should be free to do so... that has been judged by a free society as an abuse of freedom. But there are plenty of people who like to push the limits for no other reason than they want to exercise their 'freedom'.

EDIT: Yikes - after posting this I realized that we are really veering into the political. If this needs to be removed by a mod, I will not be offended...

[Eric]

I am done with it getting back to all things axe related.
You know, I've thought about what you're saying quite a bit more tonight, and I think I agree.

I was trying to say this in my original post, but I think I watered it down too much. Yes we all screw up, and yes I can forgive. However, I don't think Mayer saying this is OK. At all. Freedom of speech or not, he is an a$$. Glossing over it by saying we all do it or that people will forget about it or that there are more important things is never an OK reason not to care or to accept abuses. Human decency and responsibility is a simple enough concept, should we care to try for it.

</soapbox>

Anyway, thanks to both Robert and Maxi for bringing this to my attention.

[mrmudcat]

Aside from his talent as a musician, I find him to be a pretty classless individual.

The things he said about Jessica Simpson are typical of this. Cruel, insensitive and just plain hurtful comments about someone he briefly dated say a lot more about John than they do about the woman...and it's not just Jessica Simpson he's made disparaging remarks about. I don't know why any decent woman would date him given his lack of self control. He acts like a 14-year old on the playground...only his playground is the world stage.

I'll bet his mother is really proud every time she reads another of his interviews.


AGREED:cool:

[piebaldpython]

Just watch this hysterical Chris Rock video and ask yourself why people can laugh at it but not at an off the cuff remark by Mayer

The difference is that when Rock talks he's talking as a BLACK man about blacks. It's a whole different story, as to audience reaction, when you're talking about your own group. The audience listens to Rock as one of US, and yeah, that does make a difference in how they react to somebody.

Listen from about 2:30 to 4:35, some of the funniest, most honest stuff you'll ever hear.

[just strum]

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones

[FrankenFretter]

I guess I'm a bit of a fence-sitter in the Mayer matter, but I do find it fascinating and pleasing that all of you have become so polarized over the issue, and you've all said some very pertinent and well thought out things here. Bravo, Fretters! Things like this make me happy to be a part of our little community.:applause

[Ch0jin]

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones

Also, People who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones....

Hilarious Chris Rock clip too :)

[Commodore 64]

The things he said about Jessica Simpson are typical of this. Cruel, insensitive and just plain hurtful comments about someone he briefly dated say a lot more about John than they do about the woman

Maybe I read his comments wrong, but it sounded like he was saying she's a sexual dynamo. That's hardly disparaging. :drool

That said, I've always thought he was a douchebag although the skits he did on the Chapelle Show were really funny..

[Ch0jin]

I believe it was "Sexual Napalm" (from watching TMZ)

I saw a TMZ guy ask Jessica about this and she laughed her butt off when they brought it up. I'd take that comment as a compliment if someone said that about me!

Anyway, I could care less what John Mayer says, I just chimed in for my previous "grass houses" joke ;)

[oldguy]

Everyone says something stupid now and then. Sometimes they wish they could take it back, sometimes it comes out funny.
And some people are really good at doing it repeatedly.
If they don't learn from it or use discretion, they become known as a$$holes.

[Bloozcat]

Maybe I read his comments wrong, but it sounded like he was saying she's a sexual dynamo. That's hardly disparaging. :drool


Maybe it's a generational thing (I certainly hope not), but I was raised to be a gentleman. And gentlemen don't speak of such private intimacies as John Mayer does. Oh, I've certainly had acquaintances who have, and I've been in enough locker rooms to have heard it many times before, but it's still inexcusable. Just imagine if it was your daughter that Mayer was speaking about. Or maybe your sister or a good friend.

As to the free speech right, there has to be self regulation in the exercise of this right. In the classic example, is it OK to scream FIRE!, FIRE! in a crowded theater and then disavow any responsibility for those who are then trampled to death because of your actions?

[sunvalleylaw]

Blooz, that is a very interesting discussion that I spent almost a semester of law school studying. You bring up the classic example of cause for restriction of free speech. That discussion could get into politics I suppose. I would be happy to have a discussion about it off hook.


But beyond what is legal to say, there is the issue of what is right to say. As my Dad, always pointed out, just because an action is legal does not make it right. I am a big JM fan, and think he is better than these comments personally. I hope he learns and moves on.

[piebaldpython]

Maybe it's a generational thing (I certainly hope not), but I was raised to be a gentleman. And gentlemen don't speak of such private intimacies as John Mayer does. Oh, I've certainly had acquaintances who have, and I've been in enough locker rooms to have heard it many times before, but it's still inexcusable. Just imagine if it was your daughter that Mayer was speaking about. Or maybe your sister or a good friend.

Right, not the gentlemanly thing to do, I agree. That being said, I've been in enough gyms and bars to hear guys talk that kind of stuff. However, there's a HUGE difference between BS'g with 10 pals and saying stuff in a venue so that EVERYBODY knows what you think.

[Bloozcat]

Blooz, that is a very interesting discussion that I spent almost a semester of law school studying. You bring up the classic example of cause for restriction of free speech. That discussion could get into politics I suppose. I would be happy to have a discussion about it off hook.

But beyond what is legal to say, there is the issue of what is right to say. As my Dad, always pointed out, just because an action is legal does not make it right. I am a big JM fan, and think he is better than these comments personally. I hope he learns and moves on.

Ah, yes...Humanities Philosophy class...

What often gets lost in the discussion is the era in which the Constitution was written and the mores of the society then (hmmm...an anthopology discussion too!). Civility was a given expectation. They were gentleman and ladies then. Even the barbarity of war was conducted by gentlemanly rules. So, personal responsibility in the exercise of the first amendment was expected as well.

Perhaps John Mayer never had the benefit of having been taught the manners of a civil society. It doesn't necessarily mean he's a bad guy, just one who's a little uncouth. I hope he has a friend or someone he looks up to who cares enough about him to take him aside and speak to him about it. I don't dislike John Mayer - I don't even know him. But I do dislike some of his behaviors.

[Eric]

Wow SVL -- editing others' posts in the pursuit of perfect grammar?? You ARE hardcore!

[sunvalleylaw]

Wow SVL -- editing others' posts in the pursuit of perfect grammar?? You ARE hardcore!

LOL! No, not Blooz's, my typo!

[oldguy]

I think Mayer's a very talented guitarist. I really enjoyed his music when he moved toward the blues. He may never have the social skills to let his sense of discretion override his need for attention when being interviewed, then again, he may learn from his transgressions. You shouldn't talk trash about people you've been intimate with, or, as the old saying goes, "don't kiss and tell".
But to be honest, I like Joe B. more as a blues player, and I would be astounded to read such remarks by Joe in an interview. Mayer, I wasn't that surprised. Go figure.

[Bloozcat]

Well, I guess we can rule out a simple, unthinking, faux pas regarding John's recent comments.
http://wonderwall.msn.com/music/porn-company-offers-mayer-a-job-1538283.story/?gt1=28135

[FrankenFretter]

Well, I guess we can rule out a simple, unthinking, faux pas regarding John's recent comments.
http://wonderwall.msn.com/music/porn-company-offers-mayer-a-job-1538283.story/?gt1=28135

Now that is funny!