The crappiest guitar possible-project

[deeaa]

Well, I was tidying up in the basement and it dawned on me that I had a freak assortment of old parts lying around, possibly enough to build me a guitar, even.

Then it occurred to me, since they won't make a _good_ guitar, I could make the crappiest possible guitar with as little effort as possible, and proceeded to work.

Got me a beat-up plywood strat body, and affixed an old Flying-V neck. Well it didn't seem to fit well so I sawed off an inch from the end w/a power saw, then used a rubber hammer to force it in the pocket. Fits snugly, but kind of droops downward a little. Accidentally also sawed thru the truss rod end, but that's only good as it should be a truly shitty ax in progress. Found some assorted screws and spacers and screwed it tight.

Then I eyeballed where approximately the bridge should rest, and used an old warped piece of sideboard to get it pretty much in the center in relation to the neck. Found an old Nashville bridge, and since it seemed by eye to be about the right height, I just screwed it down. Adjustment options are just too hi-fi for this build! And to accompany a stop-piece, this time I didn't bother with screws, just nailed it there.

Well at this point I remembered I have this entire Squier picguard with mics and all in place, but decided that'd be too hi-fi so I rummaged thru the shelves till I found three different single-coils from satan knows what guitar, and used a couple of thin nails to nail one down at the bridge, eyeballing the height to be and position. Should work well!

That took me literally less than ten minutes in all, but now it's nearly done!

All I need to do is solder in a jack for the mic, I think I'll skip even the vol pot for now, and then I need to find some machine heads. Some screws to hold something for a strap, and it'll be good to go when stringed.

I'll be really interested in seeing how well or badly I can make this bastard sound :-)

Pics follow in a moment...and when it's all done, expect also videos :-)

[deeaa]

http://www.kuas.net/Muut/IMAG0354.jpg
- Detail of the magnificent bridge system. It's a little off-center because the neck isn't quite straight in the pocket, this corrects the situation.

http://www.kuas.net/Muut/IMAG0359.jpg
- Backside view showing the elaborate neck fastening.

http://www.kuas.net/Muut/IMAG0360.jpg
- Neck pocket. You can see the extreme speed luthiering skills at work here; revealed and broke the truss rod cavity...

http://www.kuas.net/Muut/IMAG0362.jpg
- She goan be a beaut! :-)

[kiteman]

Now that's a real frankenstrat. :)

[Zip]

Awesome build. No pickguard, please - it'll detract from the natural tone & beauty. I'd leave it as is.

And the bent nails are sheer genius. Should really add to the sweet sustain.

[deeaa]

Been thinking maybe I should after all put in the whole 3-pickup set...just so that then it'd sound just like any Squier at least pickup-wise, and people could better detect the fine nuances my specialized build creates in the instrument sound :-)

I mean, it's just a few more nails at this stage.

Just looking for a set of tuners now...found one set for sale for a fiver, but they're 3+3 as they should and the price is kinda high...I'd like line 6, so even that would be wrong, and even cheaper, after all, this build has cost me virtually zero euros so far, all parts have been given to me or literally from some junkpile :-)

[marnold]

The guitar will certainly have a punk vibe. My guess is that it will never come close to intonating, but it should be interesting.

[Bloozcat]

I'm not sure that"crappy" goes far enough, Dee....:rotflmao:

[FusedGrooves]

Awesome.....put it on Ebay and see what you can get for it. I'd love to see your Item Description! :D

Nails and all.....you Sir, are a genius!

[omegadot]

I'll buy....but not for much;).

[Katastrophe]

Awesome.....put it on Ebay and see what you can get for it. I'd love to see your Item Description! :D

Nails and all.....you Sir, are a genius!


Be sure to call it a "heavy relic," filled with "mojo," if you do sell it!

Genius, indeed, a mad, guitar ripping genius!

[deeaa]

UPDATE: I scored a set of tuners for it, so now I have all parts I need. Just need to attach those machine heads and nail in some assorted pickups - I decided I'll put in all three in traditional Strat style - and it's string-up time!

Killer busy at work&other too just now but expect video clips soon(ish).

[LeadedEL84]

OMG this is funny stuff. I think I've seen guitars like this on ebay before. That's what you call a RAT O CASTER! Those in the traditional hotrod scene will know what that means....

[deeaa]

Well, the guitar is now ready. It is axtually quite a nice player. At first the bridge was too low, but I crammed a screw under it , forcing the treble side higher so it will allow bends high up too without problems. The neck is rather thin znd nice, and the scale allows for soft touch. Intonatipn is quite OK no worse than those one-piece stopbar gibsons or 3-saddle teles - slightly off here and there but much less than your regular acoustic for instance. Luckily the neck tension works ok.

I need to post some videos/sound clips, but also on that front it's quite usable...I will probably use it to record some parts where I need a soft strat sound.

All in all, it sounds and plays better than my first factory-made strat copy ever did...

[deeaa]

Here:

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_270.JPG

Overall photo shows well how much to the side the bridge was set due to neck direction. Now has Squire pickups; just snapped a piece off the pickguard to jam it in.

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_271.JPG

Got tuners! One is broke, the shaft I mean, but somehow works just about.

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_272.JPG

The Gibson scale neck fits in place with an inch sawed off.

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_274.JPG

The hi-fi style bridge height adjustment screw and nail...

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_275.JPG

A good view of the nailed stopbar. Only later realized the nails went straight thru, so I had to pound them flat on the other side.

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_276.JPG

The neck pocket might have cracked some when I hammered the neck in (it was a bit too wide to fit so needed plenty of power. Also it's a bit tilted still so I had to raise higher strings to compensate.

http://deeaa.pp.fi/images/Phone2010_278.JPG

Finally the backside showing off the quality of the woods...and some nail protrudement correction marks, plus someone carved a foul word up there, not me...

[deeaa]

OK!

Here's a video for your...eh, pain?

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With those squier single-coils and an amp less than famed for drive sounds, the drives are a bit lacking. But, all in all, it sounds quite OK to me. Even intonation was close enough just by eyeballing the distances.

This is not meant to say that small changes in material etc. won't change the instrument's sound, but seriously - this guitar has _nothing_ good or correct about it, everything is made as bad as I could, built in 30 minutes flat all together, and it cost under 20 bucks but _still_ it is quite useable both playing-and soundwise, and, well, I don't know if putting thousands in a guitar would really make any better noises for a lot of uses. It's just a plank of wood or whatever, and pickups, no magic. Of course a few hundred more will buy a much better instrument, but hey - I've played worse factory-made instruments too!

[deeaa]

As of now the video won't show...here's a direct link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugOxWQIjOTY

[Monkus]

That.is.awesome.....wow.!

[oldguy]

ugOxWQIjOTY

I like it, Deeaa!
Really nice, and goes to show ability is a big part of the equation.:thumbsup

[marnold]

Sounds pretty good, actually. You've certainly got yourself a one-of-a-kind guit-fiddle!

[Eric]

Pretty cool. You're like the savior of cheap-a$$es everywhere!

So tell me, where do you spend your money with guitars? Pedals? Amps? Cables and accessories?

[poodlesrule]

So tell me, where do you spend your money with guitars? Pedals? Amps? Cables and accessories?

I think he mentioned beer before.

[deeaa]

Lol, yep beer for a large part plus I have a 10-month old so wife's not working and I have to support the family alone :-) I do buy and sell lots of pedals and such too. Just gettong an sd-1 for instance...tend to sell them off too cheap then if I don't like 'em much.

But, basically, got me four great guitars already, don't need more...only been thinking of selling one in favor or a floyd one....I got this gas for a full-floating bridge to realize some quirky recording fantasies...I've had maybe 5 floyd axes but always so.d 'em off.

[Bloozcat]

There's a TV show here in the US called "American Pickers" where a couple of guys search junkyards and old barns in rural areas and buy broken down old items which they restore to useable (and valuable) form.

Could be an idea for you Dee. "Found in Finland". Got a nice ring to it...well, in English anyway....:AOK

[Eric]

Lol, yep beer for a large part plus I have a 10-month old so wife's not working and I have to support the family alone :-) I do buy and sell lots of pedals and such too. Just gettong an sd-1 for instance...tend to sell them off too cheap then if I don't like 'em much.

But, basically, got me four great guitars already, don't need more...only been thinking of selling one in favor or a floyd one....I got this gas for a full-floating bridge to realize some quirky recording fantasies...I've had maybe 5 floyd axes but always so.d 'em off.
I suppose what I was trying to say is that your point seems to be that you don't need to spend much cash to get an axe that plays well and sounds good. You certainly don't need to spend thousands of dollars, as long as you have some sense of what matters.

So my question is whether there's anything worth spending money on. Amps, etc? Is there any area of gear that really needs a decent amount of money invested in it to give you good results, or is it pretty much all cork sniffing?

[deeaa]

I suppose what I was trying to say is that your point seems to be that you don't need to spend much cash to get an axe that plays well and sounds good. You certainly don't need to spend thousands of dollars, as long as you have some sense of what matters.

So my question is whether there's anything worth spending money on. Amps, etc? Is there any area of gear that really needs a decent amount of money invested in it to give you good results, or is it pretty much all cork sniffing?

Oh, definitely there's plenty to spend on. And guitars too - I mean, I would never play this thing professionally. It works fine at home but rigors of the road and real life uses, keeping tune etc. are a different matter. But you're right - I've long believed that if you spend 400-500 bucks sensibly on an electric guitar, you really can't get a better one simply by shelling out more money. Just better looks and, well, of course satisfaction, which is a big factor too of course. Yet under that mark it is nigh impossible to really find real professional quality too. Maybe with crazy good luck in a pawnshop or something, even half of that may suffice for a truly awesome guitar...but generally IMO roughly 400 is what you do need.

And...amps - that's where you need the money, if you want the best. A well designed tube amp won't come cheap. Strings too, no reason to save on them, change often. Well, with amps you can get totally pro sound and excellent home sound for very little thanks to modern modelers etc. but if you're really making an unique, _your_ sound and recording it, you still need something a little special in that department, not what a million others play. You can make a guitar rock hit single playing a junkshop stella but it won't likely happen if the amp is a run-of the mill modeler. Well for some nu-metal act etc. it might ;-)

It's pretty much the same in Hi-Fi. You don't really need a CD player any more special than anything out there, instead you can never buy too good speakers. I don't believe at all in all that hi-fi hype, super cables and stuff...IMO even 'high-end' amplifiers are largely stupid, because even a $100 Sony amp produces better sound quality than a $200.000 speaker could ever hope to reproduce.

But yeah, I would rather have one or two guitars worth 200-500 bucks but well adjusted and tweaked, and ten good amps, than vice versa. Good amps are so expensive it just naturally gravitates amassing more guitars and not amps...I always regret selling any good amp I had but I just don't have the money to keep lots of amps costing hundreds around.

And, unless you want to take the time to learn how to adjust and tweak guitars yourself properly, it's always worth it to pay for proper intonation and proper neck setting and proper fret work and polish etc. I'm often amazed at some really good, even pro players I know really care next to nothing about setting up their axes. They just take them to a luthier a few times a year, when they start feeling they aren't as good to play as they should be. Me, I go over my guitars nigh every time I play to make sure they're perfectly set, and once a year I give 'em a full treatment with fretboard conditioner and all. That is worth time or money too. Many a cheap guitar can be soooo much better with some TLC given to its neck alone it's just uncanny.

More things I don't want to save on include patch and guitar cords, guitar pedals (although I don't usually think boutique is any better) and any accessories related to transferring the sound to recording; microphones, stands, speakers, recording devices.

[Mr Pants]

Brilliant. I once saw a guitarist called Wild Willy Barrett, who supported John Otway, and he had a similar looking crap-o-caster which he built himself. Brilliant guitarist though. Nice licks yourself.:thumbsup

[deeaa]

Thanks :-) do check out the finished merchandise...:-)

http://www.thefret.net/showthread.php?p=183558#post183558

[Telefinken]

Hyvä project! :thumbsup
That bridge height adjustment..."thing"..is ingenious, You should apply for a patent on that. http://www.offsetguitars.com/forums/images/smilies/grin.gif

[Nelskie]

. . . and goes to show ability is a big part of the equation.:thumbsup
Not big . . . biggest. But well said none-the-less oldguy. As for the guitar, deeaa, here's another dude that thought highly of the DIY method.

“So I went ahead and made me a guitar. I got me a cigar box, I cut me a round hole in the middle of it, take me a little piece of plank, nailed it onto that cigar box, and I got me some screen wire and I made me a bridge back there and raised it up high enough that it would sound inside that little box, and got me a tune out of it. I kept my tune and I played from then on.”

-Lightnin’ Hopkins

If you don't know who Lightnin' Hopkins is, check this out:

http://www.guitarsolos.com/videos-lightnin-hopkins-rock-me-baby-%5B8AY4zM7jB2c%5D.cfm

GREAT guitar! Great thread.

[Bloozcat]

Nelskie???

Well, I'll be!

How have you been?

[gordy_sg_no1]

for being a P.O.S. its plays well .............. strangely i like it.