Needing fretter advice... band content

[Katastrophe]

And now, fellow fretters, I am bummed.

The band has played two shows, and there are 4 or 5 songs in the first setlist that I'm just not getting. I've played 'em over and over and I can't seem to commit them to memory.

Everyone else has their parts nailed, and I'm looking like a big ol' dork on the bass. I've got no problem on the songs that I play guitar on, other than I've spent so much time on bass that my chops are starting to suffer.

There is no room for negotiation on these songs. They're staying in the set. We're supposed to have a total of 40 songs down by now.

I'm thinking that it may be time to pack it in and quit. I hate to do it, as there are undoubtedly other shows that have been scheduled that I have yet to hear about, but at the same time, I don't want my lack of bass talent to hold everyone else back.

My practice time is limited, with taking care of Baby Kat, and going to Older Kid Kat's events, along with work and all the other stuff that everyone else has to go through. I don't get how the other guys are able to put in 2-3 hours of practice at home, 4 hours every Sunday, and still have time for family and all the other daily obligations.

What say you, wise and all knowing fretters? Any advice would be greatly appreciated...

[Spudman]

Quitters never win.
If you really love to play then don't let go of a band that you already have going. It's really hard to start another or find one to join.

Look closely at your time during the day. Map it out on paper and find the spots that you can give time to the music. It sounds as if the hurdles are really not that big. You might need better time management is all. If you really love it you can do it.:AOK:

[just strum]

To add to that, identify where you are hung up. If time is an issue there is no reason to rehash the parts that are ingrained in your head.

You are probably putting unnecessary pressure on yourself and that only compounds the problem. Break up the problem areas into chunks that are more manageable. It may look like it will take longer, but if you are not "getting it" the way you are doing it now, then the chunks or smaller sections will speed up the learning process.

As for Spud's "Quitters never win." - that's true - and there is a lot of pride in "At least I tried" So don't give up, think about ways you've used in the past to learn.

[Plank_Spanker]

I would hang in there. You'll master those tunes.

[t_ross33]

I'm not sure what your band's dynamic is, are they having fun with it, or are they trying to perfectly cover the tunes? I'd say fake it til you make it. 99.9% of the people you are playing for won't be able to tell the difference anyway. It's hard to strike the balance when you are starting out, but if everyone is on the same page as far as expectations go, then there has to be some allowances for a break-in period.

Do you use cheat sheets on stage? It really helped us when we were first putting our setlist together, no matter how "un-cool" it looked. We still use them as we have over 70 "active" tunes in our setlist now (with 35 or 40 standby) and new stuff added all the time. I have my notes arranged in order in a binder on a music stand that I try to place discretely to one side.

As time goes on (we've been at this a little over 2 years), I find myself referring to them less and less.

[Childbride]

[she says wearing her guitar baby pullups and medium gauge pick pacifier]

kat, don't give up. don't do it, man, it will kill you if you do.

you've worked too hard.

i tanked my lesson last week, badly. i've been playing for hours today with a backing track he's made for me and i still don't have it. but i'm better. and i WILL do it.

you Can. you Will. break it up into chunks, do it over and over and over until it sounds like barry manilow and your will is about to break from the agony. [oops, i'm going to get it]

it will come. i will send you TexFretVibe. Use the Force, Luke... :D :beer: :pancake: :rockon:

[edit] i didn't help by saying i played for hours... i apologize. i don't have small kids and therefore have more disposable time. analyze your day, as others have said. find the hidden pockets of time that you may be missing. but i stand by my guns... i really know in my heart that you can do this.

[Katastrophe]

Thanks for the advice and encouragement. I'll keep trying. No practice yesterday, so I have another week to get these tunes down before we get another CD with another 20 plus tunes on it.

t_ross33, I think I'm going to get a music stand and a binder with the tunes in there for reference. I could place it behind one of the PA cabs for discreet help when I need it. Thanks!

[sunvalleylaw]

All this advice sounds good. Keep at it!

[Blaze]

Just listen to those tunes every where , in your car , in your kitchen etc.. till you ll get it deep in your mind ..That s what i do when it happens ..


Blazes :dude:

[moon]

First, if you need a music stand in front of you when you are on stage, then put a music stand in front of you. If anyone in the audience, including any other musician, says anything to you about it, ask them why they are watching you instead of playing their own gig. Second, keep working on the songs. Try to cut out as many notes as possible. Chop it to it's basics. Then add notes back in as you can. Supposed to have 40 songs by now? You'll have 40 songs when you have them. My band is planning a break in July, with limited engagements during the rest of the summer, to learn more songs. Goal: 2 new sets. Regardless if we achieve that much or not, it will be a good freshening up. But, we also know that sometimes a song can be more difficult to learn than others. So, choosing the RIGHT songs for the group as a whole is key. Split Decision (my band) had the first practice in a couple of months last Friday night (we were gigging every weekend for a little too long). Because of good song selection, we pretty well polished up 2 songs that none of us had played before. So, stick to it. You can do it. :AOK:

[Childbride]

Kat, i felt badly about my post all day long [remember, hyper analytical and self-deprecating]

i never assumed to know how you feel about the band and where you are in your life.

you yourself have to weigh where you are, and what you are willing to sacrifice to do what you are doing, and i apologize

i am a total novice to this instrument, just a year and a bit in, and admit to such. i just love it. i cannot project me onto others. and i've never met you.

you do what you need to do, buddy, and everything will work out fine.

family first, but you find your own way, and i know you will.

i'm sorry if i upset you with my post earlier. :)

[Katastrophe]

No worries at all, CB... I thought your post was quite encouraging!:AOK: