Can someone please explain this?

[pie_man_25]

yeah, I spent a half a day in the hospital after a gig I played in a local pub, playing both hardcore and metal bands. Now, whenever you get a bunch of hardcore kids and metalheads in the same room it never goes well, they just hate each other. basically it went like this: we opened the show and it went okay, not great but okay,the crowd generally seemed to like it, the next band was sorta like hardcore mixed with thrash, so there was tons of slam dancing, for some of this I just so happened to be minding my own business headbanging, and this hardcore dude (about six feet tall, 200 pounds, to my 5' 8" 125 pounds) just shoves me and I hit the floor, and got back up. I don't know why I did what I did next, but I punch this guy, just right in the nose, and he picks me up by my denim jacket, and throws me into the wall, then kicks me a couple times real hard in the ribs and the bouncers come, brake it up, and give us a warning. after this, I apologised to the bouncers, the hardcore guy, and the band, because such a thing is unacceptable. Maybe twenty minutes after the next band started playing (also hardcore) went by that I decided to go to the washroom, I do my business and was washing my hands when the same guy and two of his frinds walk in, this guy grabs me, smashes my face into the mirror, braking the glass, and shaking me up really badly, I just managed to push back hard enough to startle this guy and he let's go, I instinctively grab a piece of the mirror and just start slashing at this guy, he jumps back to his two friends blocking the door, both of which bigger than me. they spend a couple seconds, then they all just rush me and I freak out, cornered in the washroom, I jabbed a guy pretty hard, but the other two grab me, and the last guy just kept pounding me until I lose consciousness. The next thing I know, I'm in a hospital, my parents freaking out, and my best bud just sitting there, he explains that after ten minutes, he realized I was in the washroom for quite a while, and he found me there in the washroom, then I just sorta burst into tears and freak out.

I'm really confused right now, I'm asking pretty much why this sort of stuff happens, especially why I punched that guy, why I had to react in such an unacceptable way, and why those guys had to do what they did, and why this happens so often, like it's perfectly okay.


edit: I'm pretty much okay, and out of the hospital, my nose is broken, and I'm preyy beaten and have some stitches in places, but otherwise healthy, i return in a week or so to "record healing progress" and possibly get the stiches out.

[R_of_G]

the short answer is because human beings are animals and sometimes those instincts take over and our better judgement gets pushed to the back of our minds.

hope you recover quickly from any injuries.

ps. i'd have punched the guy in the face as well.

[thearabianmage]

It's a discrimination/segregation thing that people have developed through hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. It sucks, I know. I get it all the time, but never in the face (or ribs). As you said, you reacted like that out of instinct, which is what any carbon-based life-form with a functional nervous-system would probably do. Imagine cornering a wild animal (not that I am drawing comparisons between you and a wild animal) but the first thing it does is stand its ground. So did you. They were cowards, though. I think you were brave to stand up to not just one person bigger than you, but also 3. . . In the same night. It takes courage and balls, but that's what us metalheads are known for, right? (most of the time, anyways - when other metalheads aren't ganging up on dudes 3 v 1)

Anyways, I know what you mean. It's stupid how people who like 'alternative' music (i.e. metalheads, rockers, emos, hardcores, goths, cyber-goths, etc. etc. (I hate these bloody terms!!!)) get hassle from other people for liking heavy music - so they respond by segregating themselves and giving each other hassle. It's like a rock 'n roll uncivil war going on! It's terrible!

Look, I don't like 'emo' music, but I ain't gonna give a little pansy hassle for sportin a fringe, wearing fingernail polish, and squeezing his stick-legs into women's pants. You know why? Cuz I don't want some jock to give me hassle for having long hair, long fingernails (right-hand giddy technique), and pant-legs wide enough to fit a small Ethiopian family in. Simple. It's called empathy.

May the rock help you heal your wounds.

[Rabies]

Wow...what a situation.

I'm not playing this situation down...don't get the wrong idea. Everyone that has posted have some very good points and all...

But why do people get so aggressive and feel like they have to 'dance' (ie, smash into each other and act like a loon) whenever some 'hardcore' or 'thrash' type music comes on? :thwap: :confused:

[just strum]

Wow...what a situation.

I'm not playing this situation down...don't get the wrong idea. Everyone that has posted have some very good points and all...

But why do people get so aggressive and feel like they have to 'dance' (ie, smash into each other and act like a loon) whenever some 'hardcore' or 'thrash' type music comes on? :thwap: :confused:

Pent-up anger?

[thearabianmage]

Pent-up anger?

Misdirected testosterone?

[WackyT]

Just be glad they didn't decide to kill you. I learned long ago, when I was stationed in England, never go anywhere while clubbing alone. I know lots of people say that violence on TV, in movies, and in video games has no bearing on human behavior, but I personally think it desensitizes you. Back when I was a kid and the most you did in a video game was shoot spaceships, asteroids, and tanks; we didn't have this extreme violence in everyday life.

[marnold]

Pie, dude, I'm glad you're OK, but I'll with WackyT in that you are very fortunate that your loved ones aren't planning a funeral right now. Unless you're a blackbelt or something, that's a fight that's going to end badly. It's not right or fair that he'd shove you, but I've never found a need to prove my correctness by getting the living crap beaten out of me.

I will disagree with WackyT about the videogame connection though. Just as one example: look at the problems the Hell's Angels caused in the hippie era when they were hired as "security."

Get well soon. Don't let this stop you from playing or going to hear music. Just be careful and travel in a group.

[Algonquin]

Pie my young friend... there are not likely to be clear and definitive answers to be had right here and now. Don't let yourself get dragged down to a level you are not... violence is not the answer.

Best advice I can give is to learn from your recent incident, and know if this happened again you'd turn and walk away. Not everyone will agree with this, but it deserves some consideration.

Peace out...

[just strum]

Best advice I can give is to learn from your recent incident, and know if this happened again you'd turn and walk away. Not everyone will agree with this, but it deserves some consideration.

Peace out...

I could agree with this except don't turn, this type of person would club you across the back of the head - a coward hunting in wolf packs. Walk away, but walk backwards.

[Algonquin]

I could agree with this except don't turn, this type of person would club you across the back of the head - a coward hunting in wolf packs. Walk away, but walk backwards.
Agreed :beer:

[Simon]

Boy that was a scary story pieman - wishing you a speedy recovery...


I could agree with this except don't turn, Walk away, but walk backwards.
Ditto... Says reason, but instinct sometimes takes over, as mentioned. I have on one occasion shocked myself by adminstering a (very moderate) punch to the body of a person I was arguing with, under the influence of a couple of beers... :(

[Spudman]

I'm really confused right now, I'm asking pretty much why this sort of stuff happens, especially why I punched that guy, why I had to react in such an unacceptable way, and why those guys had to do what they did, and why this happens so often, like it's perfectly okay.


Testosterone.

Sorry you got hurt and I hope you heal well. Not everyone thinks and reacts that way so don't loose faith in humanity. There are plenty of non violent metalheads and hardcores out there.

[piebaldpython]

PIE MAN 25.......glad that you are OK.......as to your question......you reacted as you did because it's a survival instinct......however, an instinct that we all need to learn to repress given the situation.....it has nothing to do with types of music, just a thing that seems to happen where there are different types of people around....so, it happens with music, sports, racial, ethnic, religious, etc, etc.......here's why we all need to learn to repress rage at times......that guy got up in your face and you smacked him......so, now he has his buddies around and VOILA, instant testosterone for him as he knows (with backup from his buds) that you are now "dead meat" and he is kinda forced to attack you because of goading/urging from his pals....so, if you are SOLO, learn to bite your lip, turn the other cheek and if FORCED to fight, you better damn well be willing to main/kill if you need to......if you arent', then swallow your pride, take a couple of hits and hope for the best....sometimes taking a couple of hits to the face is better than being pounded into a coma, right????

[Tim]

Learn to pick your fights or don't fight at all. There is always someone bigger than you. If your opponent is smaller than you, they probably know someone bigger than you.

I have not been in a fight since I was in the US Air Force (1972). At my present age, I would not want to be in a fight with even a teenager. It would hurt too much and with a long recovery.

You did the right thing by apologizing. It seem he was not man enough to except it. As expressed by other Fretters, never be alone in those kinds of places. Hey the woman go in pairs all the time. Just don't let any one hear you ask your buddy to go to the men's room with you. You may get hit on.

[pie_man_25]

thanks a lot guys, Like I said before, I don't normally react like that, I'm strongly anti-violence, I just wasn't thinking, times before I've managed to keep a cool head, just this one I didn't think, (let's face it, civil war by GnR changed me). like you guys, my parents, and my friends, I'm glad it was a trip to the hospital, and not a morgue, anyways, the chicks at school really dig the scarred look, but I'm healing relatively quickly, and most of the stitches are gone, another week or two two and my nose will be fine.

[sumitomo]

Whew Pie glad your ok,I got my butt kicked before at a bar years ago when that slam dancin went on.Come on over to the blues crowd for awhile while you recover were all laid back and a mellow bunch.Sumi:D:D

[warren0728]

i almost got my but kicked at a bar called CJ's (brian should know the place) i had been at waaaaaay too long one day (college days)....luckily my best friend caught up with me before i did....i was at the end of a table of guys (one of whom i thought got barbque sauce on me) and my friend knew i was in trouble when i said (an this is the truth)...."i'm gonna kick there butts....how many are there?" :eek: :thwap: he promptly led me to the door and drove me home!

ww

[ZMAN]

I once saw a pretty famous guy who is about your size come into a club that I was at. Back then this guy was known for his punk look and style but was a pop singer. Of course he was followed in by a local bodyguard who is 7 foot 1 and almost 400 lbs of no fat muscle. The body guard appeared in several low budget horror films. The moral of the story was that this guy just acted like and idiot all night pushing people around and being a complet pain in the *** but nobody would go near him. So if you play this type of club again I would recommend a rather large friend accompany you.
Oh yea the little guy I saw was Billy Idol.

[Plank_Spanker]

Pie Man,

OUCH!. Good to hear that you're on the mend. Back in my younger days, I played a few bars that erupted in all out brawls. The band did it's level best to lay low and stay out of them, but we had several pool cues stashed under the drum riser just in case we were forced to join the fight to protect our gear. A judicious application of the pool cue across the side of a few heads usually convinced the stubborn ones to leave the band alone.

People get stupid in bars and clubs. They fuel up on alcohol and grow ten feet tall and bulletproof.

Heal quickly, man, and put it all behind you.