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Thread: Worst One Liners

  1. #1
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    Default Worst One Liners

    Let's share some BAD one liners, that you should refrain from using!


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    If beauty could kill, you would be a weapon of mass destruction.

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    The Law of Gravity is nonsense. No such law exists. If I think I float, and you think I float, then it happens.
    Master Guitar Academy - I also teach via SKYPE.

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    "Does this napkin smell like chloroform?"

    - (from the movie Hall Pass)
    I was just a regular guy. My only super power was being invisible to girls.
    - Dave Lizewski, Kick-A$$

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    The closest you ever came to a brainstorm is a light drizzle!

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    Oh wow, I love the cheesy one liners!

    My favorite goes like this. Walk up to lady (or guy) run your finger down the outside of your glass, collecting condensation. Tough your shirt and her (his) clothing with finger and say "Hey, how about you and I go home and get out of these wet things"

    Then there's the old classics like "Fancy heading off for a steak and a shag?" "No?" "Vegetarian are you?"

    In my younger days pre-mobile phones. "Here's 20c You better call your flatmate and tell them your not coming home"

    So many come to mind!

    Also Tung, that one is awesome!

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    "Do you want to f***, or should I start apologizing?"
    Quote Originally Posted by Spudman
    Does anyone read the original post?
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  6. #6
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    Heheh....the best one I know is kinda reverse one-liner...for those occasions when some chick pesters you to no end and you'd just want to get drunk and not look for company...just say 'look, thanks, but I rather masturbate' :-)

    Works every time!
    Dee

    "When life's a biatch, be a horny dog"

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    You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools.

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    Girl, you must be tired, 'cuz you been runnin' through my mind all night long!
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  9. #9
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    Well, if you won't dance with me, I guess a BJ is totally out of the question....

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Katastrophe View Post
    Girl, you must be tired, 'cuz you been runnin' through my mind all night long!
    OT: Two observations:

    - some of this material would make great blues lyrics starters...
    - the clubing/dating scene has changed a bit since I last looked, which is also a blues theme of its own!
    Less golf, more saxophone

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    Did it hurt when you fell to earth from heaven?
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  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by oldguy View Post
    Did it hurt when you fell to earth from heaven?
    LOL! Good one, OG!
    Guitars:
    Fender 2006 MIM Fender Stratocaster HSS in 3TS
    Ibanez RG 570 with a bridge Invader
    ESP M II Deluxe with a Tune-o-Matic bridge
    Eleanor, the magical, mystical Road Worn wonder Tele
    Blackstar HT Club 40

  13. #13
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    “Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk past again?”

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