The Musician's Ultimate Joke Book

[duhvoodooman***]

Took my son w/ me to today over to the local Guitar Center to pick up a couple of cables for my new amp, and he spotted the above titled book and had to have it. We've already gotten the $10 purchase prices back in belly laughs. Here's one that tickled me:

Q: What do you call somebody who hangs out with musicians?

A: A drummer.

More to come. Many, many more....

[Katastrophe]

Q: How many drummers does it take to put in a lightbulb.







A: None. We have machines to do that now.

[duhvoodooman***]

Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None. The piano player can do it with his left hand.

And while I'm at it, let's not forget us guitarists:

Q: What do you call a guitar player with no girlfriend?

A: Homeless.

[SuperSwede]

Q How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A Eight, one that changes the light bulb and seven that says that they could do it better.

[tot_Ou_tard]

Q How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A Eight, one that changes the light bulb and seven that says that they could do it better.

How long does it take a guitarist to change a lightbulb?

...2 minutes per bulb and 3 days spent looking at the hue of the of the bulb and wondering whether he should put the GE Reveal back in or spring for a high quality NOS Sylvania 60 Watt.

I'd be playing my guitar right now, but ya'know those cheap production 60 watters have a harsh yellow hue to them & I am to busy fiddling with the dimmer switch to see if I can bring down the yellow without making the whole room too dark & muddy looking!

[tot_Ou_tard]

How long does it take a guitarist to change a lightbulb?

...2 minutes per bulb and 3 days spent looking at the hue of the of the bulb and wondering whether he should put the GE Reveal back in or spring for a high quality NOS Sylvania 60 Watt.

I'd be playing my guitar right now, but ya'know those cheap production 60 watters have a harsh yellow hue to them & I am to busy fiddling with the dimmer switch to see if I can bring down the yellow without making the whole room too dark & muddy looking!

I'd go florescent for the reliabilty, but they always look sooo florescently.

Are there any good hybrid incandescent/florescent bulbs? I am also in the market for a good flourescent modeling bulb, particularly if it can model a good handwired boutique bulb.



....ooooohhhh, look at the *SATURATION* when I crank the dimmer!

[Spudman***]

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?




A flat miner.

[duhvoodooman***]

Q: What did one musician say to the other when he noticed the clever army officer standing nearby?

A: See, sharp major!

[Justaguyin_nc]

Q - Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners?

A - So the rest of the band can understand them.

Q - What's black and blue and laying in a ditch?

A - A guitarist who's told too many drummer jokes.

[Spudman***]

You heard about the drummer that locked his keys in his car?
He had to break a window to get the bass player out.

[ZoSo65]

You heard about the drummer that locked his keys in his car?
He had to break a window to get the bass player out.

LOL,,I know a couple people that will really enjoy that one.

[duhvoodooman***]

Q: What did the drummer get on his SAT's?

A: Drool.

[warren0728]

Q: What did the drummer get on his SAT's?

A: Drool.

lmao....my roomate (before marriage) is a drummer so i always love a good drummer joke!

ww

[SuperSwede]

tot_Ou_tard, perhaps you should check out the kind of bulbs they use on fotball arenas. Very cozy light from those. I think you can get away with a 1500W system before the wife wakes up

[tot_Ou_tard]

Whhoooaaaa!! 1500 watts of pure bulby hue!!!!

--With this bulb I get no blazing solos

[tot_Ou_tard]

Ooooohhh, the *GLOW*!

[SuperSwede]

I must check out that Grand Funk Railroad album then

[r_a_smith3530]

I must check out that Grand Funk Railroad album then

Grand Funk @ Amazon

New and Used at under six bucks!

[SuperSwede]

Rob, I already found it at the iTunes music store.