Quote Originally Posted by deeaa View Post
I dunno - it's not that it's scary to rock out or what other people might think - it's just that it makes me personally feel stupid.
You know, I think you touched on some decent points in there as to why you are the way you are (practical, fear of failure, etc.), and I think there's something else that might be at play in all of this: cynicism. It's possible you don't want to really let loose or try because you're afraid of the judgment, which sometimes is a reflection of how you would view yourself or how you view others. I feel that a lot of the time, and a lot of your words sound familiar to me (well, except for the atheism part). I mean, you already kind of touched on it with the part about being afraid to commit yourself to something 100%.

Dunno. Just an idea. I like your idea of embracing the difficult times and the bad parts of life. It's too easy to forget the contrast and appreciate the present when you have been through crap, much less when you haven't. I think embracing things like loss, hardship, etc. really bring the blessings of life into focus that much more. It's something I'm trying to realize more as I get older, particularly now when life is kind of tough.