Warm Danish on your body? Help/Suggestions welcomed!

[oldguy]

An old timer once told me if the wood is from a female tree, it will always "think it's ash looks big" .
Seriously, any wood will expand or contract enough for the finish to crack if the temperature/humidity fluctuation is radical enough (I had a Les Paul Goldtop do it once, maple top/ mahogany body). Lacquer finishes are more prone to it, hence the polyurethane (re."plastic") finishes so popular nowadays. Poly is said to be more environmentally kind than nitrocellulose lacquer as well. Nitro lets the wood "breathe", poly don't, hence the Danish oil treatment I decided on for Maddie. Yeah, that's her new name, Maddie Brown.